He's not sure how he feels, except perhaps that it's an answer. He'd tried with Vex, shortly after they came here, and Vex said no.
He's worried. When they'd talked, Vex has not said this was a reason why not, but he'd given other reasons. Have those all stopped applying? Did they only apply to Rafa? Was Vex lying to him then, or to Kavinsky now?
Which would be better? ]
if you are happy then i am happy for you
but you have been hurt before
i do not want it to happen again.
be careful won't you? he has been grieving like i was when i hurt hunter.
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you are together now, as he was with mark
is that what you mean?
[ Sharp questions. Sharper than they should be, maybe, but for once Rafa struggles to find a softer way to say it. ]
do you love him, kavinsky?
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yeah
yeah
[love is not always accopanied by increased poetry ok]
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does he love you?
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[nobody ever compared him to shakespeare, all right.]
he picked me
[there's some quiet pleasure in that. not so quiet.
but not as loud as kavinsky typically is, about anything.]
wasnt sure he was gonna
[if he were a better, more thoughtful person, he'd ask rafaello if it was all right. if rafa was all right.]
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He's not sure how he feels, except perhaps that it's an answer. He'd tried with Vex, shortly after they came here, and Vex said no.
He's worried. When they'd talked, Vex has not said this was a reason why not, but he'd given other reasons. Have those all stopped applying? Did they only apply to Rafa? Was Vex lying to him then, or to Kavinsky now?
Which would be better? ]
if you are happy then i am happy for you
but you have been hurt before
i do not want it to happen again.
be careful won't you? he has been grieving
like i was when i hurt hunter.
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u think it fake?
u liked more guys after hunter
fell in love wit more guy swhatever
what the fuck do u mean
[if he's a little bristling, that's because-- well, he was insecure about it before. it's nothing new. rafa isn't wrong to worry.]
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despite loving him
vex was obsessed with mark and that loss is recent
i do not want you to get hurt again.
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[it takes kavinsky awhile to write. it's an honest 'okay,' not a passive-aggressive one, but he knows it could be construed that way.]
thank u mom
do u think i can b careful & happy at the same time
that sounds like ti woudl be fun
[;;;]
can ppl do that
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with the right person.
[ Which isn't Vex, Rafa thinks. Not any more than Caleb had been. Perhaps even less so than Caleb had been. ]
you will have a long life, kavinsky
you have time to be happy. i believe you will be
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[he does. right now, anyway. for now.]
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kavinsky if ever you are not happy
you can always come to me.