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maskormenace
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Up to R for language, individual threads/comments to be marked with warnings accordingly in the subject header if you plase.
Up to R for language, individual threads/comments to be marked with warnings accordingly in the subject header if you plase.
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[That was an accident. He considers this.]
What would you do?
[This is a bad road. Like a very bad road. But it's also the road that Billy has most accessible to him at the moment. It's the easiest one to look down. Kate and Teddy are gone. Nathaniel is gone. Gansey is gone. Billy has Kitty, and Kitty is a lot, but it isn't enough. And then there's the matter of Loki.
Billy isn't sure he'll ever really be able to just let what happened with Loki go.]
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Well shit. [is the toilet seat thing real? kavinsky has no idea if it's real. it's interesting, if it's real.] Obviously, the old cunt doesn't think your power is actually fucking useless. He's just getting you where it hurts. [kavinsky wipes his nose with his wrist, and then he walks over to start pushing other pieces of glass together with his feet. they're going to make a creepy altar out here. celebrate billy kaplan's transition into evil.] Guess you got a couple of options.
Hatefuck him and-or his husband, [kavinsky squints at the thought. he's not sure billy has the chops for that, but billy is currently melting a beach with controlled lightning, so.] Or find out where he hurts. Hit that instead. Which could be hatefucking him and-or his husband, but there's probably some other shit.
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[Billy considers this. He does not, as Kavinsky suspects, have the chops to hate fuck anyone. The lightning rolls at Kavinsky's feet, jumping from place to place. It never really gets too close.]
I don't think sex would work. Gray may be an asshole but Toby, it's-
[He sighs.]
It's not really that simple with Toby. They'd forgive each other and that would be that. Welcome to boring relationshipland, K.
[He calls him K because he calls Teddy T and he calls Kate B, when it suits him. He opens his hand.]
It means you don't fall into hatesex traps. Besides, I almost threw up the one time I kissed him, so I'd rather not relive that nightmare.
cw c-word
he doesn't like the k, but he doesn't comment on it. surface irritation. what's a mosquito bite when you're carrying a bullet in your guts.]
So when you say he thinks you're useless, you don't mean you wanna patch up and get in good. Right? [he shrugs his skinny shoulders, and clinks another brick of glass down. stoops to grasp another, pull it free and moving it over on the sand. he walks just within the edge of the flicker of lightning.] You mean you wanna destroy him. Except you like that Toby cunt, so not exactly.
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[The lightning snaps this time, coming up to bite at Kavinsky, but it doesn't touch him.]
God, I'm so sick of his stupid smug face.
And I'm so pissed he saw-
[He saw a memory of Teddy and Billy together the other day, he made fun of him for it, and after everything - after hallucinating Teddy and after the embarrassing conversation with Gansey and after the disaster that was the spell in June, this was the last thing that he wanted. So you. Thank you, Kavinsky for the memorysharing (only Billy doesn't know it was Kavinsky that caused it.)
Billy's teeth snap shut.]
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for whatever reason a magic wielder were to stand in a dubious circle in a field of energy.]
Pretty sure there's a spell for that, [kavinsky says, very nonchalantly. mind you, he'd still be nonchalant even if he knew what his spell had done.] But your story keeps changing, baby. One sec your magic's useless. Then you're useless. Then it's him talking, or it's his fucking face. [kavinsky pauses for an instant when the lightning gets close to him, his eyes flitting across the sand.] You sure you don't just wanna fuck him-fuck him?
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[When he circle is complete, it lights up a bit. Billy's being coy.]
I don't really use spells.
[He scowls a little at the next part though. Because Kavinsky's right. But then this is a whine and blow shit up session, so Billy feels entitled to change his story. That said-]
I'd fuck a lamppost, in public, wearing a MonMon Walk costume before I even considered sex with Dorian Gray.
[That part is really disgusting.]
I hate him, I don't want to hate fuck him.
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who knows what it'd be, in reality, if the ground opened under his feet.
but anyway, back to billy.]
So you don't wanna fuck him. Don't have the stones to kill him. Basically no violations of the Geneva convention, [kavinsky flaps a hand around, as if he can't believe it, but,] like, whatsoever. [preposterous!!] So you're just lancing the hemorrhoid, talking to me. [but he smiles, and jerks his head at billy. come on loser!! get in the glowing circle.]
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I don't know, is pulling out someone's soul and hanging it like dirty laundry from a really tall building against the Geneva convention?
[He steps into the circle, and then the ground doesn't drop out from under them, it lifts up. The sand passes through the disc of spinning blue.]
How high do you want to go?
You're not afraid of heights, are you?
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I'll get as high as high can go.
[kavinsky may be afraid of a great many things, but heights have never been one of them. he draws closer to billy anyway, an instinct based on fear but many times removed in practice. peering over the mage's shoulder, to see if the beach really is going to fall away.] Can you really do that shit? Pull out somebody's fucking soul?
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[And up they go, shooting fast into the sky. The beach falls away, and it glimmers - bright and strange, the sea tossing and turning. Billy sometimes feels like he could shoot right to the moon, but he doesn't - he slows them down when they're pretty high up, the air around them cool, the view going forever. Billy's lightning storm is still rolling underneath them for a little while, but soon that dies too.
He hasn't done this in a while - the blue disc method of flying another person - but he used to do it so often that dropping someone is out of the question.
As to Kavinsky's question, he shrugs.]
Sure. Souls aren't like teeth, I mean, they don't come out easy. But they're just energy, I've held them before.
tw suicidal ideation
this is novel actually. he goes to the edge. closer then he probably should, whether or not he's invincible. a riot of nerves in his guts, not the same as fear.] And what does that do to a motherfucker? [he asks, feeling the wind in his hair, the bite at his skin. he thinks if he were shot out into space, he'd be dying forever and never die. it feels like what he's stuck with now, but even he can acknowledge, it'd be worse.]
It hurt? Kill you?
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[He considers it. This is a sort of a philosophical question.]
I don't think it would kill someone. It might hurt, but I can't say for sure. I mean, if I destroyed a soul, sure. But, well.
I don't think it's like your heart or your liver.
[He makes a face, but it's that he's thinking. He hasn't considered this. He knows that Gray has one. He knows what it looks like, newly minted and shiny. But he doesn't know what would happen if it were outside a body.]
A person can live without a soul. I don't think it improves their moral character, but it can happen.
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some people are like that.]
So asshole's asshole would get bigger and that's it, [kavinsky observes. he takes his eyes off the earth below, turns his head back to look at billy, teeth flashing white.] Babe. You are no good at hurting people on purpose. Maybe a skill needs cultivating.
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Once I almost wished someone would die.
[But he didn't.]
And another time I made an entire parade of neo-Nazi's disappear.
[He does not know where they went.
They zoom a little, further out towards the ocean. They're actually moving pretty fast, but it's like a plane - it's hard to really perceive just how fast Billy's disc is moving them]
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but he knew a boy who liked his bible, and he thinks for a moment about floods and dreams and ending the world. they're lucky he doesn't have billy's power.]
Having a soul sounds like a lot of work, sweetheart, [he says, peering down into the abyss.]
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You have one too.
[He says it and sits so that his legs dangle off the edge. When you can fly heights aren't really a thing. When you can bend reality, fear stops being something that you feel, except fear of being lonely.]
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so he sits himself down. puts his feet over. and promptly stops feeling his feet for a few seconds, adrenaline pounding up his legs. but it's nothing like sylar's foot on his back, the bonesaw whining in his ear. it's nothing like that at all.] Sure.
Wanna take mine out and see what happens?
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That's a bad idea.
You don't want me to do that for real.
[But he sounds like he's trying to convince himself, not Kavinsky.]
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[because it could fail. because he could die. because billy could freak out and drop them into the sea, miles from shore. because he could drown for decades and nobody would find him or know.]
How you gonna know if it's some shit you wanna try on Grey. If you don't take it for a test drive? [his eyes glint. manic. he's come out on the other side of fear, and not necessarily for the better.]
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[Because souls aren't physical bodies, the nanites can't rebuild them. Because Billy likes Kavinsky, for some reason, enough that he would be upset if Kavinsky were totally gone.]
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Maybe nobody'd even notice.
[kavinsky bends an elbow into billy's ribs, encouragingly. what's a soul for, if not cutting and burning?] Come on. Pull it halfway, maybe. See if you can.
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I swear to god, you need to yell if it hurts.
[Which is a yes.
Billy holds his hands out and thinks of how to structure this spell. He meant it when he said that they're not really spells. Sometimes, when he's feeling very maudlin or very scientific, he thinks of his magic like science. Everything is possible - just 99.999999% of things aren't likely. What he's doing must be something akin to affecting the probability of things. Making it more probable.
That isn't what he's thinking now. Now he's thinking of Kavinsky's soul. What it would look like in his hands, shiny and bright. What it must look like in general. Does it look like Kavinsky thinks it does? Are souls tainted by morality or is that a construct made up by hack writers?
Dorian's soul looked like light. Kavinsky's glows, too, and Billy reaches into Kavinsky's chest, careful. For a moment they occupy the same space, impossibly (improbably) and then Billy is grasping something. His eyes are glowing blue, and he pulls, slowly.
Carefully.]
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he looks down to watch billy's hand. at some point in the process he realizes he's not seeing the magician's hand outside of him and encroaching in, so much as he's seeing it inside of himself, tangible and unnameably strange. his heart kick steps faster, anxiety where there should be agony. maybe billy will pull out a burning lump of coal, or a parasite, he thinks.]
Is it big? Above average.
[he can't not ask. he can't not joke. he doesn't blink.]
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It's warm.
[It's a squirming thing, but it twines around Billy's fingers like string, until Billy is pulling it out, slowly, and then it's there in Billy's hands. It's a light, pulsing between them, like a heart in Billy's hand, only there are strands of it going back into Kavinsky.
They are in the air, in nothing, in the dark with the ocean below them, and Billy is holding Kavinsky's soul. It's peppered with sprays of bright color, beating carefully, and Billy cups it suddenly in both hands.]
You okay so far?
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cw suicidal ideation
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cw homophobic language
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